IT'S ONLY PAIN

by Andrew Liles

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1.
This time tomorrow It will be the same time As it is today And yesterday Are we clock like? A circle with our hands Moving round Returning from nowhere Only to begin again From where we are One journey short We travel just once Clywais lais di-wyneb Llanwodd darlun fy meddwl Clywais lais di-wyneb Treiglodd amser nes dydd o haf Diflannodd trem y gaeaf Yr wyneb a’r llais, ymddangosodd, drachefn Fel cyfanwaith, syndod Loes yn unig Loes yn unig Loes yn unig
2.
One body seized by a thousand minds The soul fights vainly against the crushed bones Narrow thoughts from within Inflicted with scars and made blind by a noisy, wordless world The bomb blasted soul explodes into vapour Dissipated through space Lost in a sea of emptiness Yet chained to the darkness of time Struggling, crippled, tearless pleas The soul in a corner whispers against the cacophony One body seized by a thousand minds A thousand minds seized by coloured light One body seized by a thousand minds A thousand minds seized by coloured light
3.
Faceless, fleshless, souless You never were, You never were Yr elfennau, y synhwyrau, y sfferau, yn chywrlïo a sisial yn chwalfa o sŵn a thawelwch du Agor y ddaear, a chau ar ddim Troella tragwyddol ddim yn llonyddwch, pyla lliwiau’n ddim Cwympa cydbwysedd a gwiriadau fyny Di-wyneb, di-gnawd, di-enaid Dinistria tân di-ddiwedd yr hyn nad yw yno Mae yno nawr, ond nid bellach, nac erioed y bu Anrhyloyw, dwys, di-deimlad Ganwyd yn drachwantus a di-anadl, marw’n agored a threuliedig Ni chefaist d’amsugno na’th sathru’n gyfan Di-wyneb, heb ei ganfod, y rheiny sydd ni nad ydym na fuodd erioed neu a fydd Bywyd llonydd neu ydoedd neu ydyw Det er bare smerte
4.
One moment then all is lost Quick panic, emotion wrongly split Terrible words, shocking deeds Wounded lives, caused by tempestuous thought As time passes and anger lasts Slow death comes as the soul erodes to nought Water swells, lust rots body and mind To overcome purity in simple union Winkle out, use the knife of self deception Let blood flow, kill the future, destroy self Leave defeat of selfish being As an open wound to the song of... Love I’m Beyond the Cosmos I’m Beyond the Cosmos I’m Beyond the Cosmos Radiate, Radiate, Radiate This is me... Engraved in Plastic
5.
In a shuttered shell a pinhead spot Giant thoughts envelope space and universe Dust settles upon a micro atom of the mind Nature natural and human made Control destinies and thinking strand The body feels the pain and joy of senses Contrast to the spirit Floating in a sea of mystery and light Pull fast, fuse the triad with a fourth dimension Not yet found Crack the shell and thus released Consume it or in freedom’s wanderings To the land of phantasy Rock strewn beach of a deserted cranium A million grains of sand Cerebral store house as electronic library Hold secrets of language thought and action If empty and void seek from wiser contacts Feed the sustenance of thought The wilderness refresh streams of other minds
6.
Sailor Boy 03:46
Take a rope around your throat and pull it hard until you choke By all the types whose minds are dead and to the lions you should be fed Glide upon the silent ocean Beneath the surface of tranquillity Yield to darkness Voodoo man, Zen experience Mystic in his barest cell Simple folks and their faiths Man of knowledge and truth Ignorant, simple I see a dark dank cave A worried father tends a spluttering candle Sweat and droppings pervade the gloom A box made of broken wood Filled with summer’s hay Dung heap village with pious pope Take a rope around your throat and pull it hard until you choke By all the types whose minds are dead
7.
Lliwiau 03:23
Du, Du, Du O fewn Du, teimladau duon, du mewn angau Disgleiriach yw glas, claear efallai Oer, ond nid marwaidd Gwnaiff glas i ni godi’n golygon Glas yw traean y blaned hon Symuda glas Cynnes yw pinc, Tyner yw Pinc, Meddal yw Pinc Melys yw arogl Pinc, emosiwn yw Pinc, siwgr yw Pinc Poeth yw coch, angerdd yw coch Cryf, tanbaid, byw, deifiol, ffydlon Pŵer yw Coch Daw gwyrdd, da yw’r cyfan, gwyrdd yw popeth Yma, cymedrol yw gorfoledd Bywyd a byw Gwyrdd yw gwyrdd
8.
Humanist 01:48
{Is my soul transient?} Existing only to be finite Image of the infinite mind Held by the truth of non-belief, believing The evidence of the five senses To supply answers to a sense unknown? Free the extremity of matter and mind Hold true this unknown knowledge
9.
Winter has arrived, dispute and disorder abound Some wish to live without being kicked around Light has gone, reason has fled Many are sick, most in the head I want all at no cost to me No struggle, no effort to pay the fee A trialogue is a slow falling cliff It sinks beneath itself Just walk along and speak your say The surface shows the bubbling fermentation From the depth of chaos Spreading the mire filled receptacle Called the mind Burnish the impurities of the soul What vestige left in past illusions Soaked in the liquid of the hop Grey ash clings to the lapels of a jacket Swollen veins at ankles stretch Monosyllabic ejaculations Spewed with fetid stench From the pit of the stomach As the liver rots, we stand and stare Cruel minds vent fun at our victim He will die soon Yet we laugh This is me engraved in Plastic The digital voice of daydream death I am Beyond the Cosmos I am Beyond the Cosmos I am Beyond... Radiate, Radiate, Radiate C'est seulement de la douleur C'est seulement de la douleur C'est seulement de la douleur
10.
Μητέρα, που είναι οι 4 γυιοί σου; Εσύ, που από τη ζωή σου έδωσες ζωή Ποια ντροπή σου αναλογεί; Ποια είναι η αμαρτία τους; Λάμπεις με το δικό σου φως; Είναι η αλήθεια μέσα τους; Είναι η ζωή θάνατος; Ένας βωμός να καλύπτει το λάθος Είναι η ζωή χαρά; Ένα δώρο που θρέφει τους άντρες Τι είναι μυστήριο; Η πλεκτάνη να κρύβεις τον εαυτό σου Είναι η αγάπη ένα μυστικό; Μια παρηγοριά εν όψει της αιωνιότητας Αγάπησα, αγαπήθηκα Οι μέρες πέρασαν, περνάνε, θα περάσουν Οι παλιές σκιές σβήνουν καθώς νέες σχηματιζονται Η Ειρήνη υπήρχε, υπάρχει κάπου Ήρθα και θα ξανάρθω Αποχαιρέτησα και αποχαιρετώ για τελευταία φορά

about

All the lyrics used on It's Only Pain were written by Liles' father, Michael Liles. They were discovered when clearing out his spare room after his death in 2017. The poetry was written sometime in the late 70's and has been given a life here.

Contributions come from: Matt Davies, Effie Nikolaou, Arwen Schiavone, Karin Park, Faust's Jean Hervé Peron, ex Mayhem frontman Maniac and Mared Lenny (the critically acclaimed Welsh singer known as Swci Boscawen).

REVIEWS

The Quietus - Noel Gardner

Andrew Liles, an important post-millennial part of the Nurse With Wound/Current 93 ‘family’, releases music at a fairly breathtaking rate, yet It’s Only Pain is described by label Dirter as his first “general release” since 2018. Never mind the taxonomy, clock the concept: all the LP’s lyrics were written by Liles’ father in the 1970s, discovered after his death, and are interpreted – often translated from English – by multiple guest vocalists. Many are already in the musician’s collaborative orbit, some are more surprising. My recollections of Mared Lenny’s late-00s music (frankly pedestrian Welsh language indiepop under the name Swci Boscawen) did not mark her as someone with a future appearing on NWW solo projects, yet here she is on opening song ‘Skid-Row Schizoid’, narrating bilingually over a song that’s a bit like if Van Der Graaf Generator had been an influence on Fourth World music.

Liles’ taste for dramatic arrangements can border on kitsch but more often charms. Karin Park, synthpop soloist and Årabrot member, leans into her roles with terrific relish, initially reading over sawing strings and clanging piano on ‘A Thousand Minds’ before adopting an operatic register for ‘Beyond The Cosmos’ and ‘Humanist’. Faust’s Jean-Hervé Peron hams it up spiritedly over ‘Down The One Side’s stern gothic folk and ‘Bywyd Llonydd’ revels in its diverse guestlist: Matt Davies, owner of a Welsh record store and a fine ‘dramatic reading’ type voice; Maniac, ex of black metal originators Mayhem; and Awen Schiavone, author of a children’s book about a penguin named Pedro.

credits

released August 6, 2021

All words by Michael Liles.

AUGUST 2021 : DESCEND AND DISINTEGRATE

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Andrew Liles UK

Andrew Liles is a prolific solo artist, producer, remixer and sometime member of Nurse With Wound and Current 93.

Guide to downloads:

Green Border: Liles Solo Releases.

Green Image: Monster Releases.

Green Circles: Monochromatic Releases.

Grey with Liles Black Metal Logo: Moral Nihilist Releases.

Green Dots: Live Recordings

White Border: Collaborations and Remixes.
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